


i’m here (i’ll always be here)

by jentlelisa



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt, comfort au, jennie’s crying and lisa’s there for her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:49:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28317033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jentlelisa/pseuds/jentlelisa
Summary: Lisa wakes up in the middle of the night without Jennie by her side.Because in the end, all we want is someone who will be there no matter what.
Relationships: Jennie Kim/Lalisa Manoban | Lisa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	i’m here (i’ll always be here)

I woke up in the middle of the night after noticing that Jennie was no longer beside me. I glanced around the room including our balcony hoping to find a silhouette of her but instead I was faced with nothingness. All I managed to find was her home slippers, still placed neatly on the foot of our bed. 

I stood up and quietly stepped outside the room, wanting to look for her. I’d like to think that it’s the cold breeze of dawn emanating from the open window of our house that sent shivers throughout my body but deep down, a part of me knew that something was terribly wrong. 

My foot landed on the floor of our living room and still, there was no sign of the love of my life. I was starting to get worried. Jennie doesn’t just disappear in the middle of the night. The unusuality of this scenario didn’t help the anxiety building up in my stomach. 

Anxious yet determined, I walked towards our kitchen and there I heard a very faint noise. It was a sound that could very much pass off as nothing if it weren’t for the deafening ambiance of the night. The sound grew louder as I approached the source of it. My heart dropped with what I saw, for never in my life was I prepared for it.

It was Jennie, the person I was looking for, the person I loved the most in my life, all crumpled up in corner of our kitchen floor with her head down, shoulders shaking, crying her eyes out without anyone to comfort her at all.

To say that my heart broke when I saw her in that position was an understatement. My body immediately went into a fight or flight mode. I ran to her like my body just knew what it had to do.

“Hey...” I worriedly knelt down in front of the girl I love. Her eyes slowly looked up at mine and seeing her face all washed up from tears shattered my heart into a million pieces.

“I’m here, I’m here.” I uttered as I held her body closer to mine. Her sobs grew louder just as my arms grew tighter around her body. I felt her hands tugging my shirt tightly as if I was the only lifeline keeping her together. 

I didn’t ask what was going on, or why she’s pouring her heart out in the middle of the night. None of that matters right now. I only know that if I could take away her pain right at this moment, I would and I wouldn’t hesitate, not even for one second. 

“I’m sorry, Lisa.” She managed to say despite her endless sobs that won’t seem to stop. “I just— I just don’t want you to hear me crying. It’s stupid.” She tried to laugh it off, perhaps feeling embarrassed that I saw her in this state. 

“Shhh..” I caressed her hair softly. “Don’t be sorry. It’s okay, it’s okay.” 

Feeling my shirt dampen with her tears almost made me lose what little composure I have. I never liked seeing Jennie cry. It feels as though someone stomps on my heart over and over again everytime I see tears streaming down her beautiful eyes. But I have to be strong, especially in times like this when Jennie needs me the most. 

You see, Jennie’s always been perceived as this strong-independent girl that can handle anything. She’s headstrong, hated asking anyone for help. The consequence of that perception, however, was that no one really gets to know the real her. 

The real her that quivers with anxiety, that always needs be assured, that needs to know where she is or else she’ll overthink everything. 

She’s afraid of letting people close. Afraid that if she does, people would find out that she’s everything that is too much about a person. She hated feeling like a burden, of being pitied at, of being thought at as weak, after all who wants to be seen as that? It took me a while to get to know this side of her, and four years later I’m still on the process of getting to know her further.

Everyone else would probably think that she’s too fragile, somewhat of a hassle, a liability— but not me. Because my love for her will never make any of it feel like a burden. 

It never will.

After all, why would I find it as such when I love Jennie so much? I love her to the point that if anything happens, whether good or bad, I want her to come to me first. I want to be her safe space, the person she goes to with anything that’s going on with her life, no matter how superficial she may think it would be. 

I want to make her feel better when she’s lonely; to sing to her when she’s sad and make funny faces to make her laugh. To buy her favorite food if she had a bad day; to buy her coffee whenever she had to work late nights; to drive her around while she does her errands. To bake her cookies that she would crave for; to ask her to dance to either a very silly song or the most romantic one that always reminds me of her. 

I want everything and anything with her.

Even the person that she is when she’s stressed and accidentally lashes out at me. The one who always needs to have the last say. The one who sometimes chooses to stay away whenever she has to think and lastly, but most especially, this version of her right now in front of me.

The one who chooses to suffer in silence without anyone knowing.

From all the good ‘jumping up and down of happiness’ and the horrifying ‘crying in middle of the night’ — I want and love all that of her, each and every part of her. I love all that she is and all that she could ever be. 

“I’m such a mess, I’m sorry.” I heard her apologize again. She pulled away and tried to flash a smile while wiping her own tears. “I’m really sorry for waking you up, love. You should’ve been resting.”

“It’s okay, baby. You didn’t wake me. I just got worried because you weren’t next to me.” I smiled as I fixed the strands of hair covering her face. “Don’t cry na, okay? I got you.” I whispered as I held her closer, placing a kiss on the top of her head. 

“I love you and I’m gonna take care of you, okay?” 

_Always._

**Author's Note:**

> — kudos and comments are appreciated  
> — find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/jennieski)


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